DEP's Alphonse and Gaston routine

Alphonse and Gaston were characters in an eponymous early 20th century cartoon strip whose excessive politeness and repeated deference prevented them from so much as getting though a doorway. Inspired by their routine – “After you, Alphonse.” “No, you first, my dear Gaston.” – baseball broadcasters still describe two fielders who both shy away from a catchable fly ball as “pulling an Alphonse and Gaston.”

As baseball season approaches, two units of Pennsylvania’s Department of Environmental Protection (DEP) are pulling their own, bureaucratic version of the Alphonse and Gaston routine. DEP’s version, however, is not funny.

Citizens and regulators from several government agencies have repeatedly observed excessive amounts of sediment being carried into a High Quality segment of the Youghiogheny River adjacent to the Great Allegheny Passage in Fayette County. The sediment is generated by erosion occurring on a parcel of land known as the Curry site, where timbering activities have exposed and disturbed the soil.

Enter Alphonse.

Most erosion and sedimentation problems in Pennsylvania are handled by DEP’s Waterways and Wetlands (W&W) Program, which delegates some regulatory responsibilities to county conservation districts. If you call W&W or the Fayette County Conservation District, however, you are told that they lack jurisdiction (authority) over the Curry site because it is a permitted surface coal mine. W&W suggests that you call DEP’s Greensburg District Mining Office.

Enter Gaston.

DEP’s Mining Program takes exactly the opposite view on the jurisdiction issue: The mining company has not yet activated its mining permit and is not performing the timbering, so the Mining Program has no regulatory authority over the erosion and sedimentation problems. They suggest – as you might have guessed – that you call W&W or the Conservation District.

While DEP performs this regulatory Alphonse and Gaston routine and watches the ball drop, the sediment continues to flow into the High Quality waters of the Youghiogheny.

As in baseball, giving up a “hit” this way is both embarrassing and avoidable. Ultimately, DEP’s W&W and Mining Programs answer to the same Secretary. Like a pitcher who takes charge by calling out which of two infielders should handle a pop-up, DEP Secretary Abruzzo should direct W&W or Mining to step up and make the play. If each unit of DEP has jurisdiction over different responsible parties, the Secretary should direct both units to take action to protect the Yough.

One way or another, somebody should catch the ball.

Kurt Weist is senior attorney for PennFuture and is based in Harrisburg.